Besides my neck fracture I also have a fractured leg and ankle. Even those these are the lesser injuries they make my days even harder.
It took me 5 days in the hospital before I could walk and that was only a few steps with a walker. Getting used to the halo neck brace as well as heving a very broken leg, ankle + a hairline fracture of my rt wrist took a long time. If it wasn't one pain it was another. Pain medication has been given to me by both my ortho Dr and the neck Dr and neither seem to work on anything.
But some good news did come today from my visit to my orthopedic doctor. I can now bear full weight on my leg. No running or jumping yet, but I can now attempt to walk without a walker. This is very good news and a much needed ray of light. I am so eager to be back to "normal" that my halo begins to depress me even more. Its the monkey on my back - the weight on my shoulders. I want to fall asleep and wake up from this bad nightmare.
but i can't.
This is my reality every day. If I ever took for granted my health I certainly won't now. This has felt like a prison sentence with bars and all.
My doctor reminded me today what a mess my leg was and how lucky I am. My physical therapist says the same. I believe them. Really I do. I feel my pain as much as they see it. I have deep fears of being hurt again. The thought of lying on the side of the road like that again freaks the shit out of me. I am still so close to that event that I can still remember the pain and fear and can imagine that happening again in a variety of situations.
Car accidents come fresh to mind or maybe another motorcycle crash? All I know is I don't ever want to feel like this again and will do all that I can to prevent it. But will that lend to me me not leaving the house or being afraid of trying something new or dangerous? Injury can happen in a number of situations at home and on the road. There are risks to everything we do and it never occurs to us until we've been hit by it.
I only hope this doesn't damage me for life and only enhances my life forever.
It took me 5 days in the hospital before I could walk and that was only a few steps with a walker. Getting used to the halo neck brace as well as heving a very broken leg, ankle + a hairline fracture of my rt wrist took a long time. If it wasn't one pain it was another. Pain medication has been given to me by both my ortho Dr and the neck Dr and neither seem to work on anything.
But some good news did come today from my visit to my orthopedic doctor. I can now bear full weight on my leg. No running or jumping yet, but I can now attempt to walk without a walker. This is very good news and a much needed ray of light. I am so eager to be back to "normal" that my halo begins to depress me even more. Its the monkey on my back - the weight on my shoulders. I want to fall asleep and wake up from this bad nightmare.
but i can't.
This is my reality every day. If I ever took for granted my health I certainly won't now. This has felt like a prison sentence with bars and all.
My doctor reminded me today what a mess my leg was and how lucky I am. My physical therapist says the same. I believe them. Really I do. I feel my pain as much as they see it. I have deep fears of being hurt again. The thought of lying on the side of the road like that again freaks the shit out of me. I am still so close to that event that I can still remember the pain and fear and can imagine that happening again in a variety of situations.
Car accidents come fresh to mind or maybe another motorcycle crash? All I know is I don't ever want to feel like this again and will do all that I can to prevent it. But will that lend to me me not leaving the house or being afraid of trying something new or dangerous? Injury can happen in a number of situations at home and on the road. There are risks to everything we do and it never occurs to us until we've been hit by it.
I only hope this doesn't damage me for life and only enhances my life forever.
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