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The removal



The removal took less than 10 minutes and was a little painful. Not anesthesia was given, just a tight grip on the table was all they thought I needed I guess.

The orthotist assisted my neurosurgeon as they removed the hardware. The sound of the screwdrivers unscrewing the pins echoed through my head. The only real pain came when I felt a pressure against the front of my head when they had finished with the back pins.  The pin area itself never hurt. Actually as soon as the halo was removed my back left pin area felt relieved. I was then fitted with a plastic and foam neck collar that fits under my chin and comfortably around my neck. 

But, OH! how wonderful and weird and scary it was all at the same moment. I had fear and elation in my eyes at the same time. My head felt heavy, as if it was going to roll off.  I was terrified to turn my neck. It felt stiff and awkward.

I asked my doctor a zillion more questions about the safety and next steps. He was so casual and assured. I could do whatever I wanted he said. I could take the collar off to sleep, to eat, to shower... whenever I wanted and felt ready.  And that was it!

We walked out to the parking lot and I started shaking. My mom and W were just as happy as I was and stood wide-eyed looking at me. But I was shaking from fear, not joy. What if the doctor was wrong and I turned my head or moved wrong and I injured my spinal cord, or something even worse! What if my C2 wasn't healed!

Lot's of irrational thinking - but that's what I'm really good at.

So, Mom and W calmed me down with confidence and common sense and we were on our way back home. On the car ride back home I started to become adjusted to the prison bars being gone and the weight off my head.

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